Stop Gavin
Strike down the snake before it uncoils
So a few things about last night.
Obviously we all just watched a doddering old man humiliate himself in front of tens of millions of people and completely obliterate his legacy in the span of a few hours.
For the past five years our libtard friends have persisted mightily in their admiration for the emperor’s increasingly dubious finery, but last night Biden proudly showed the world his ass and cock and wrinkly old man balls, and today even the most obnoxious Democrat partisans admit that they can’t spin their way out of this one. The sheer spectacle of Biden’s humiliation virtually ensures that legions of voters will start to abandon him, and it seems popular culture will quickly immortalize him as “President Senile” in the same way Taft has become “President Fat” or Nixon “President Shifty.”
And on one hand this is pretty fantastic for the country. It will start lots of important conversations about gerontocracy, which in turn will facilitate the generational transfer of power and resources. We’ll probably see a lot of old dudes retiring earlier than they would have otherwise simply because they don’t want to be compared to Biden, and I anticipate that even libs will start using “Biden” as a slur against oldsters. All of these developments will obviously have a welcome impact on society at large.
But on the other hand, I think conservatives are incredibly naive to celebrate right now. It actually would have been much better for Trump’s chances if Biden had put in a somewhat respectable performance. That’s because such an outcome would have ensured Biden’s continued presence in the race, which is now very much in doubt.
The plain and bitter truth is that what happened in Atlanta last night is precisely what the most dangerous faction of the Democrat Party has always wanted to happen.
And no, this isn’t just me being a conspiratard. Look at the underlying incentive structure. Pray tell, why else would the DNC move the debate to months before the Democratic convention when that has literally never been done before?
Last night’s circus was quite simply a calculated maneuver of realpolitik to force an intransigent and overconfident President into stepping down at a point when replacing him is still logistically possible and won’t terrify the electorate.
Now perhaps some of Biden’s inner circle genuinely saw an early debate as a chance for the President to prove himself and manfully put to rest concerns over his age months before the convention. But it seems even those parties recognized a need to force the issue one way or the other. Simply ignoring it would have been courting disaster, and forward-thinking elites tend not to allow space for themselves to lose.
So Biden’s handlers and loved ones basically just let him shit his pants on national television. His most trusted inner circle subjected him to a level of indignity and personal humiliation that the history books will no doubt condemn in the harshest of terms. In a few decades people will pity Grandpa Joe as a tragic victim of elder abuse.
But today I mainly sense a seething frustration with the President, as well as the sense that Dems have no choice but to take the Ezrapill and nominate an alternative at a brokered convention. Even Biden superfan Fatty Yglesias came out in favor of this on a surprise podcast episode he posted only a few hours after last night’s debate.
Sleepy Joe is basically finished. Nominating him would mean losing 45 states while ceding scores of crucial downballot races to the GOP. The Democrat elites have known for ages what was going on behind closed doors, and would never let this happen. And that’s why they let the old dog wither away in the summer sun.
They are buying themselves the necessary time and space to coronate someone else—someone much more formidable and a hell of a lot more dangerous to the country.
Blessedly, that person clearly isn’t Kamala Harris. Everyone knows she’s a talentless affirmative action hire who shamelessly fucked her way into political office, and nobody even likes her at this point other than weird #BlackGirlMagic types.
Now don’t get me wrong, those people will need to be mollified, but the way to do that is getting Oprah / Michelle Obama to vigorously endorse Gavin while bribing Kamala into fucking off with some grotesque sinecure running a university or nonprofit.
And make no mistake, Kamala would definitely accept that offer. Homegirl might be a cynical striver who openly worships nothing but power, but like all elite sugar babies she’s also ferociously calculating about her own position in life (consider how early she dropped out in 2020), and definitely won’t be keen on facing the Democrats as another Hillary if and when she loses to Trump. A marginalized life in the political wilderness would immiserate a narc like her. Far better to cash out now while her hand is relatively strong and she retains something substantial to trade away.
Shawty’s finna sell her shot at the White House in the same way she sold the last years of her youth to Willie Brown, and the Democrat Party will be far the stronger for it.
The nominee also won’t be Whitmer or Warnock or Polis, because once the Dems have free reign to choose they will almost certainly conclude that they need another straight white dude to have any shot at holding the Rust Belt. Democrats understand that the level of animosity a woman or minority running against Trump would inspire among aging flyover dudes would be almost certain to swing the election.
People forget that Biden only won in 2020 because he didn’t inspire anything approaching that level of resentment in people (and still hasn’t, except briefly during the vax mandates), and this lack of engagement via negative polarization probably is what hurt turnout in Drumpf’s key low propensity demos. But with a woman or a black guy leading the ticket you’ll definitely see every one of those dudes at their polling station, and the Dems absolutely will have this gamed out in their electoral calculus.
The Dems know they can only win if they have a White guy to lead them. And not just any White guy—the sort of White guy who can play the masculinity game against Trump in a decently convincing way. And since Joe Biden’s brain is now tapioca pudding, there’s basically only one major figure who fits the bill.
You all know who I’m talking about.
He’s the Great Snake of the West. Xi’s Bulldog. The libtard Gordon Gekko.
He's Greasy Gavin Newsom.